Monday, July 31, 2006

Weekend snapshots

Not a lot of time to go into the details of one, crazy weekend so here are a few snapshots:

Attack of the kiler moths
My mom came up for lunch and we were going to just make it at my place, instead of going out. I opened up the pantry and... there were little moths EVERYWHERE!!! It was SO GROSS!!!!!! It turned out there was an UNOPENED bag of brown rice that must have had some eggs in it and they hatched. Ewwww.... I'm getting itchy just thinking about it. I was so grossed out, we had to go out for lunch because there was no freaking way I was eating in my kitche. I felt so dirty. Mouse and I ended up taking EVERYTHING out of the cupboard, cleaning it off or throwing it out, and wiping down the walls. Much screaming and "ewww-ing" went out for the duration of the weekend. It was like a freaking plague broke out in our pantry... I think we're being punished for something...

Buckets of Beer
Quotes of the night (mouse to sunshine)

"This is the best place EVER!"
(drunk screaming) "Look, look. It's just like the Sound of Music" (As she is pointing to small children dressed up in proper German attire"
"This is the best place EVER!"
"Oh no, I keep spilling beer on children!"

We also decided that no cups should be needed. Just give us a straw and we'll drink directly from our bucket. (oh wait, we did that...)

Oh, and the guys we met were 100% engineers. They were talking about a house party they were going to have and I yell out, "Am I invited!?!" Instead of asking for our phone number we get, "Well, we'd have to get a point of contact from someone in your group." Snore.

Check out mouse's blog for pictures of our leaning tower of empty buckets... :)

I, completely sober, drove home that night. About 1/2 mile from home, I get pulled over for speeding. I had no freaking idea what the speed limit was, we were sure he had seen us dancing while driving and was also freaking out because I did drink earlier in the night.

Officer: "Do you know how fast you were going?"
Sunshine: "No, I'm sorry I don't"
Officer: "Do you know the speed limit here?"
Sunshine: "No, I'm sorry I don't"

Officer: "Have you been drinking tonight?"
Sunshine: "Yes, sir. One earlier tonight." (I was thinking one bucket...)
Officer: "Do you know your alphabet?"
Sunshine: "Yes sir" (Oh no, now I'm starting to panic. I'm sober, but what if I forget a letter because I'm so nervous!!?!?!"
Officer: "I want you to say the alphabet starting with "C" and ending with "X"
Sunshine: "c-d-e...k-lmno..." (gasping for breath at the end) "I'm sorry sir, I'm just really nervous."
Officer: "That's okay. Take your time."

I successfully completed my ABCs and got off with a, "This is just a warning. I'm sure you drive these roads all the time. You girls drive safely."

Holy fuck - that's all I gotta say...

Dinner and a movie - had a really good time. My morning text message started, "Good morning, beautiful." (insert doopy smile here).

Saturday, July 29, 2006

To Do List

Things to do this weekend:
1. Run - done
2. Laundry - in the process now
3. Take a nap - looking forward to crossing this one off the list
4. Have lunch with mom - we're way past due on some mother/daughter bonding
5. Drink buckets of beer at German Park with the girls - with no meds to mess this night up
6. Go to the pool - pending it's not to freaking hot
7. Grocery shopping - blech
8. Go on date with JP - :)

I think I can handle this...

Today's 13-miler was pretty good. It would have been cool outside this morning, if it weren't for the humidity. I decided that I needed to forget about my splits and just relax and enjoy the run.

Mile 1 - 9:45
Mile 2 - 9:51
Mile 3 - 9:42
Mile 4 - 9:39
Mile 5 - 9:57
Mile 6 - 9:43
Mile 7 - 9:46
Mile 8 - 9:43
Mile 9-12 - 39:06 (9:47 pace)
Mile 13 - 9:45

I was tired after I was done, but I had to remind myself that I didn't run much this week. I'm planning on getting back to two-a-days next week since I won't be in a drug-induced sleep... Also, I realized that I still have three months before Detroit, so I should be fine. In fact, I think I'm doing pretty damn good this early into my training plan. :)

Thursday, July 27, 2006

Just Say No to Drugs

You know you are a child of the 80's when... the slogan, "Just say no" is still ingrained into your head.

That's it. No more drugs. I started my new meds (an oral pill and a pain patch) on Tuesday night. Wednesday, I had a very scary thing happen - and yes, I purposely left that out in my post. My heart was pounding so badly and I was getting chest pains. Half afraid I was having a heart attack or stroke, I looked up the symptoms of both and heartburn, which I've never had. Relieved, I wasn't having any of the above. During my workout with Ricky, I just felt out of sorts. Not like the previous drug-induced cloud, but just not very strong. Ricky asked if I was okay and I asked him to take my pulse. It wasn't out of the normal zone, but it felt like my heart was going to pound right through my chest. Thinking it might be stress from work, I shrugged it off as an off day. But, in the back of my mind I was wondering if these new meds had something to do with it.

This morning, I woke up and my chest still hurt and my heart was pounding. It lasted throughout the day and I began to become more concerned and certain it was the meds. I've been more stressed before and my body didn't respond this way. I held off calling the doctor though, and thought I would give it one more day.

Tonight I was scheduled to do 7 miles. Since it was storming badly out, I ended up on the treadmill. Now, I consider myself pretty dedicated and have run through a lot over the past few months. I only got through 4 miles. My abdomen did hurt, but it's been worse before. I felt very weak and wasn't able to keep up with even a light jog. My heart was still pounding and my chest jurt with every beat. Reluctantly, I got off of the treadmill and jumped on the bike, determined to get in a halfway decent workout. I didn't last long on the bike either.

So, I have decided no more drugs. Well, I'm cutting out the oral pill, because I think that's what is doing it. Patches (birth control, stopping smoking, etc.) have always freaked me out for some reason. This is no exception, especially since it is used to numb an area before a procedure. But, I don't want to drop both and not know which one was bothering me. I have never liked the idea of taking medication, but I gave it a try. Plus, my doctor told me it would take about a month before it started working. Well, I've been on one kind or another since July 3 and it hasn't helped with the pain. So, I'd say I gave it time to work. And, maybe this patch thing will help since it is suppose to numb the area and is used to treat pain.

You aren't suppose to just stop taking these types of medications, because the side effects can become worse going cold turkey. But, I've only been on it a few days and my dosage is so low that I'm not concerned. I mean, come on, what is it going to do? Cause a full out heart attack?

So, that's me taking charge of my own health. (Note to Nicole - When I rant about the inadequate state of medical professionals and health care in general, I hope I don't offend you!!! I'm just frustrated and I haven't always had the best doctors around.) What's next? I'm not sure, but it doesn't involve medication. I still will not accept that this is just how my life is going to be.

Okay, enough of the depressing stuff. Today I got my good morning text message and an afternoon, "hope your day is going well so far" text. So cute! :)

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

I think I'm in trouble...

That's what I told the girls this morning after I received the, "just wanted to say good morning and have a good day" text message from the boy. And, I got that goofy smile...

Day 1 of the new meds - not bad. I'm out of the drug haze. yay!!!!! Seriously, I don't understand drug abuse. Why would people purposely do that to their body?

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

New shoes

My new shoes came in the mail yesterday, so I was looking forward to breaking them in. Tonight's run was a 6 mile pace run.

2 mile warm up
Mile 1 - 9:23
Mile 2 - 9:35

3 miles race pace+
Mile 3 - 8:43
Mile 4 - 8:36
Mile 5 - 8:24

1 mile cool down
Mile 6 - 9:45

In a lot of pain today, but I think it makes me push myself. I kept thinking that this is not going to get the best of me.

New meds today, so we'll see how it works out. They better work because I spent $80 on two freaking prescriptions. Since these are new meds, there isn't a generic out yet. My insurance is great and it isn't much compared to what those that don't have insurance pay. But, generics are only $10. I am so thankful for my very generous insurance plan and do not understand how people can go without it. You know you're getting older when you are more excited about your great health plan than you recent salary raise! :)

Monday, July 24, 2006

"I'm just not feeling this one"

... is what I told Ricky before nearly every set of weights. I'm surprised he didn't drop kick me - instead he just laughed. I don't complain often, so I think I get away with it when I'm in a grouchy mood once in awhile. In fact, he about fell over laughing when I dropped the f-bomb (in reference to how the medicine is fucking me up.) Good workout tonight, but I felt more like I was going through the motions than actually doing it.

Called the doctor today. Left a message. Talked to the charge nurse. She was going to check with the doctor. Never heard back. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THE MEDICAL SYSTEM IN THIS COUNTRY? I specifically said, "I don't feel comfortable driving with this medication." I specifically said, "It randomly feels like the floor is about to give way underneath me." I specially said, "My coordination isn't right and I'm losing my balance and running into walls." Hello... wouldn't you be sure to call someone back with these symptoms? (It's okay, you can laugh about me running into walls. I'm sure it's a sight to see. Thankfully no one from work has witnessed it. They've just seen me lose my balance and trip a little.)

The Detroit News did a story today about chronic pain and how patients are clogging up the ER because they go there instead of their PCP or a specialist. While I don't agree with those that continuously go to the ER, I can understand why they do it. It's a pain that doesn't go away. It's not a matter of, "taking your mind off of it," like so many people tell me to try. Right. Because I have so enjoyed the last year plus of pain - every. single. day.

Obviously, I'm in a bad mood today. I keep trying to, "look on the bright side of things" but, like the title of the entry states, "I'm just not feeling this one."

Okay, here's my little ray of sunshine for the day. I found out that I did get a raise (not everyone did)! Out of a 3% pool, I received almost 5.5%! I'm still on track for my promotion and, although there isn't room for a salary increase at that time, they are open to discussing a bonus. So, my career path is looking bright and sunny!

Sunday, July 23, 2006

Running Is Stupid!

Yesterday was an interesting day. I got up a bit later than I planned, but it was the perfect morning for a run. At 8am it was 62* and a little overcast - perfect. I was looking forward to my 13-miler. Since I bumped up my dosage, I have to take one pill in the morning and one pill before I went to bed. Before my run, I was trying to figure out if I should take it before or after running. Since I had a lunch date with the boy that afternoon :) I decided it would be better to not show him that I was a crazy girl with a drug dependancy problem right off the bat.

A little bit into my run, I started to feel disoriented, which isn't the greatest while on a run. I was only a few miles in, but I had decided that running was stupid and I wasn't finishing this run. Over and over in my head I was thinking, "this is stupid. Why am I doing this to myself?" Shortly after this, I realized I had to at least get back to my car and it would be faster to run instead of walk back. As I was going back to my car, again the crazy voice in my head started saying, "this is stupid. I'm not running over again. I'm finished. Running is stupid." By the time I got back to the beginning of the path, I started thinking that all the people that hold me accountable for running, were going to ask how my weekend run went. I couldn't bring myself to say, "well, running is stupid and I quit." Then, I started thinking that if I decided later that I really did want to continue training for Detroit, if I quit now I would have missed a long run and that's never good. Ugggg.... after years of playing sports, that stupid mantra of never quitting has become engrained into my head.

Here are my "stupid" splits. Not the best, but hey, I finished.
Mile 1 - 10:14
Mile 2 - 9:56
Mile 3 - 10:39
Mile 4 - 10:30
Mile 5 - 10:32
Mile 6 - 10:02
Mile 7 - 10:15
Mile 8 - 10:04
Mile 9-12 39:49
Mile 13 - 9:57

So, that's my psycho side... but the afternoon did get better.

JP picked me up and we had a nice lunch. Afterwards, we went to Lucky's which is a bar and more upscale arcade for adults. (I had challenged him to an air hockey match last weekend.) We had a lot of fun playing air hocky, skee-ball and racing games. And, it was the first time I had really laughed in a long time. He's going to teach me how to salsa dance, so it seems like there is going to be a second date in my future.

Later that night, I was looking forward to going out with mouse and some of her friends for a crazy night of fun. We ordered pizza and, of course, had a beer with dinner. That ended up not being a good idea. While I was about to get ready, the room suddenly started to spin and I felt like the floor was going to give out underneath me. Thinking it would soon go away, I laid down on my floor and promptly feel asleep. Mouse came in to see what the hell I was doing and I told her I didn't think I was going to make it out with them. Yeah, alcohol and this new medicine just doesn't go very well together. So, I missed out on a night of fun. And yes, I am planning on calling my doctor tomorrow morning. (It does this to me even when alcohol isn't involved.) Seriously, this whole medicine thing is really interferring with my social life! :)

Today, so far, has been a day of doing nothing. Slept in, went out for breakfast/lunch and laid out by the pool. Perfect end to a good (for the most part) weekend.

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Status report

While I was out running, the boy called and left a message. By this point it's getting almost humorous, since we went onto day 3 of phone tag. I called him back, expecting his voicemail, and was obviously surprised when he answered. Feeling like a complete jackass, I told him that I was planning on leaving a message and was caught off guard when he picked up. We ended up talking for an hour and a half - no awkward silencs or lack of things to say either. He asked what I was doing this weekend, but I already had plans for Saturday. So, he said he'd call me tomorrow. He seems like such a nice guy and authentically a good person. And... he irons! I'm thinking this could be a good thing. :)

Did a six mile run tonight and it was okay. Usually my Thursday night runs tend to be faster, but I wasn't feeling well and decided to make it a nice, easy run. Ended up just a tad bit under 56 minutes, but my splits, which weren't bad, we not at all consistent. Now, I consider my pain tolerance to be quite high and tend to run through (smart or not? still up for debate) pretty intense pain. That said, about a 1 1/2 minutes into mile 5 I absolutely had to stop. The stabbing pain increased around mile 2, but got to unbareable by the 5th mile and I could not go on any longer. After a bit, I started to think that if the intensity didn't let up soon, I was going to have to think about going to the ER. Thankfully, it did subside a little and I finished up the run. It's unfortunate I wasn't feeling the best, because it was a good night for a run. The day was hot and humid, but it was a cool night air and would have been very enjoyable.

Well, it's late (mouse and I always have something to talk about) and morning is going to come early. But.... it's Friday. TGIF!!!!!!!

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Is it Friday yet?

I'm happy to report that the new medicine didn't kill me last night in my sleep (always a good thing, right?). Thanks to mouse for waking me up this morning though. Again, I slept through both alarms and missed my morning workout. Hopefully tomorrow will be a different story.

Another long day at work. Can I just tell you about how amazingly incompetent and completely stupid one of my clients is!?!?!?!?!?! And, she is one of those people that has to be in charge, even when she doesn't know what the fuck she's doing. Stupidity and the need to be in charge - not a good combo. Seriously though, I cannot stand stupid people. And, I don't mean people who aren't smart, it's the people that you just want to flick in the forehead and say, "did you just hear what came out of your mouth?" To sum it up, this Dilbert comic is up on my desk at work:

Workout with Ricky was tough. I was pretty tired and my legs felt weird. Not sure how to explain it, but they just didn't feel right. We did 8x about 180m repeats (average 27 seconds uphill and 18 seconds downhill) and then went inside to lift weights. Had I been feeling it today, I would have loved the workout. These type of workouts remind me that I'm really a sprinter at heart and I start thinking about the good ol' days when I ran the 100m and 400m in high school. My senior year I had a new coach and halfway through the season he had me run the 800m. What!?!?! That's two freaking laps! I didn't even know when I was allowed to cut in to the first lane. Strangly, I won the race and I ended up running it for the rest of the season. Good times.

Hello.... of course I called the boy back. I called tonight and ended up leaving a voicemail. So, we'll see if he calls me back. Keep your fingers crossed for me.

A little perspective

We often run around, concerned about things that, frankly, in the grand scheme of things don't really matter much. I am as guilty of this as anyone. Come on, have you read some the stuff I blog about? :) Tonight, a friend called me and was telling me about her day - which included a (peaceful) protest of the recent bombings and to encourage UN support at the Israel-Lebanon border. She is Arab-American and her family is very involved with their community and her sister is a political activist. Some of her family lives in the war zone (Like, half a mile away. Think about how long it takes you to run that far.) and haven't been able to get out of the country. It made me realize how desensitized I have become to the images on TV. But, this is her family's back yard. It really made me stop and think.

Okay, back to my simple life...

Upped my medication last night and, whew, it knocked me out. Apparently we had a big storm last night. Never heard it. I slept through two alarms and, obviously, didn't get my morning run in today. I'm just lucky I made it to work. The morning also brought on some more side effects. My saving grace was my doctor's office finally called me back with an answer. (And, yes. It did take them exactly one week from my initial call) My doctor is out of town and another doctor reviewed my file and put me on a different type of medication. We'll see how this goes. I asked mouse to make sure I'm up (and have a strong pulse) tomorrow before she leaves for work.

Work was indeed loooooooong. Got to the office a little before 8am and didn't leave to come home until 8:30pm. That means, I got home after 9pm (at least the traffic was light), ate a light dinner, and didn't start my run until after 9:30pm.

Since it was dark outside, I did my pace run on the treadmill.
2 mile warm up -- 9:30
3 mile race pace+ -- 8:27
1 mile cool down -- 10:00

After talking with mouse for a little bit, I realized I needed to do a load of laundry since I was wearing my last clean sports bra. You know you have a running problem when your dirty running clothes clearly outweighs your other clothes. Didn't throw the load in until nearly midnght. And because I'm so OCD, I had to switch them into the dryer immediately. It does go against my will, but I may let them sit in the dryer until tomorrow. I usually have to fold them and put them away right away.

Oh, and... the boy called. I was in a meeting when he called, so it was a pleasant surprise when I listened to my messages. I didn't notice it so much the other night, but he has a great accent! He's Haitian (okay, okay, I will admit that when I learned this, all I could think about was the speech class scene in Clueless. Refer back to paragraph 1 of this entry) and has a beautiful French accent. What is it about accents that make women swoon?

Monday, July 17, 2006

Thank you

Thanks to everyone who reads this blog. You helped me get out of bed this morning, even though I was SO terribly groggy. I kept thinking, "I wrote on my blog that I would get up. I can't not do it now." Well, that and, "Ricky is going to kill me tonight if I don't do my morning workout." So, thanks so much for keeping me dedicated.

I did an easy 3 miles (9:30 pace) this morning and didn't feel too bad. Tonight's workout with Ricky was pretty good, too. We did agility drills (think football camp) and a pool workout. Another trainer shadowed Ricky during our workout. This is the third trainer that has sat in during my session, so he must be good. Either that or I'm just smokin' hot. :)

Early to bed (or at least on time) tonight. Early morning workout and a loooong day at work. Seriously, who schedules 5pm meetings?

Sunday, July 16, 2006


Talked to my friend today, and the guy asked for my number. No, he wasn't chicken shit for not asking me himself, but there wasn't much of a chance that night since we were with a group of people. She was telling me what he said about me (you know, how cool and super cute I am...), and I felt like I was in grade school again. Ahh yes, the joys of dating. :)

Had a decent 4 mile recovery run tonight. I waited until about 9pm so it wasn't horribly unbearable out. It was hot, but there was a breeze and the sun wasn't beating down.

Well, gotta get to bed so I can get up tomorrow morning. Last week I didn't do any morning workouts, and I need to get back to it. No matter how sleepy I am, I will get up!

We Got Called Trouble... Again

Last night was the first mouse and I had a night on the town this summer. Yes, it is mid-July but we're busy girls (or prefer going to bed early because of this silly thing called running.) A friend of mine has wanted to set me up with a friend of hers for months, so a group of us went to the bar. I convinced mouse to go - even though neither of us were really up for it.

Another friend of mine came to our place so we could go together. OH MY GOODNESS!!!! She was complaining and obsessing about EVERYTHING. I thought mouse was going to have a throw down because she was annoying her so badly.

We were having fun, but it was so freaking hot out that it wasn't so enjoyable dancing. Mouse and I were have a good time and the guy I was there to meet and his friend looked at us and said, "well, those two are trouble." Mouse and I looked at each other, high-fived and busted out laughing. I told them that wasn't the first time we've been told that. Hahahahahaha - we're back!

The guy was such a nice guy, pretty cute and , oh by the way, drove us to get our car in his BWM. Not that I'm (completely) superficial, but it was a nice car! :) We talked about going out sometimes, so we'll see. It was nice being out and I'm glad I sucked it up and went. Maybe my dry spell of dating will come to an end, too.

Oh, yeah. Running. I'm doing a new plan that every other long run I run with two shorter runs in one day. Not sure how this is going to play out, but we'll see. Since I woke up late, I decided not to unnecessarily cause heat stroke and ran inside.

7 miles - didn't feel that great
Mile 1 - 8:45
(brief pause to vomit)
Mile 2 - 9:00
(brief pause to vomit)
Mile 3-7 - 10:00

4 hours later...

6 miles - much better!
Mile 1-6 - 9:30

Has anyone heard of such a plan? Or tried it? The worst part about it is running once, but not having that great feeling that your run is done for the day. Coming in as a close second, is having to take more showers in one day. I think I ended up taking four yesterday. (The fourth was after coming home from the bar. I'm weird and cannot go to bed dirty and smelly!)

Thursday, July 13, 2006

Hot July Night!

Tonight I waited until it "cooled" down to about 85*, so I got out the door a little after 8 pm. Still not feeling well, I was bound and determined to make it through the scheduled 6 miles.

According to my watch, it was a good one.
Mile 1 and 2 - 18:00
Mile 3 - 8:24
Mile 4 - 8:46
Mile 5 - 8:57
Mile 6 - 8:26

According to my body, not so much.
However, I am trying to be positive. So... if I can run these splits in the freaking hot and humid weather while I'm not feeling well, just think how I could do when I'm on top of my game.

Oh, here's a side note. Towards the end of my run, I swore I could smell watermelon. I'm pretty sure it was all in my imagination, but then I started craving it. Mmmmmm ~ cold watermelon after a hot, sweaty run. Yum!

I didn't want to talk health today, but here's an update on the doctor front. I talked to the nurse today and she was going to talk to my doctor and call me back with his recommendation. She never called back. So, they'll be getting another phone call from me tomorrow morning. I'm sorry, but if a patient is having difficulty with a medication shouldn't that be a priority? I don't think this is my case, but people can become very ill from taking the wrong medication. My mom was once on a medication that reacted with another medication she was taking and her doctor didn't want to do anything. It literally almost killed her. Anyway, that's the latest and greatest.

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

So. Very. Tired.

I called my doctor today to see if I should wait a little bit more to give my body time to adjust to the meds or if I should try another kind. The nurse didn't call me back until after hours and I was in a meeting so I couldn't answer my phone. So, I'll have word tomorrow.

My workout with Ricky was rough. Not that the workout was super hard, but I'm just out of it. Since I didn't get up to run this morning, I tried to do it after my workout. I got about a 1/2 mile in and called it quits. On my way out, I ran into Ricky and sheepishly said I couldn't do it. He laughed, gave me a hug and told me to go home and rest. Good idea!

My meeting tonight was about going back to get my MBA. I thought I missed the deadline to start in the fall and was planning on starting winter semester. But... I found out I can still start in September if I want. Since I was a PR major, I have to take nearly all of the "foundation" courses. So, it's going to be a while before I actually start my core classes. Uggh. There is an accelerated route I can take to get through them faster, so hopefully I won't be in school forever. I've always known I wanted to go back to school, and I wanted to have my master's before I turned 30. If I'm going to make that goal I'm going to have to start NOW.

Alright, need to get some sleep so I'll be ready and refreshed to blast thought my 6-miler tomorrow.

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Warning: Do not operate heavy machinery when taking this medicine

Yesterday I was scheduled to up my dose, which made me very nervous. At only 10 mg I was experiencing side effects, so I was sure I was going to start having hulucinations (another, serious, side effect.) I was SO sleepy today I almost didn't get out of bed. I'm talking dead weight tired. And, I'm not so sure I should have been operating a motor vehicle today. The bottle says to not drive until you are sure of how you'll react to the medication. Right. Am I suppose to call into work and say, "Um, I'm waiting to see if I think I'll drive off the side of the road before I come in today." Seriously. All the same side effects as with the 10 mg, but the nasty feeling of dizziness also kicked in. Dizzy standing up and sometimes while sitting. Also, not much of an appetite the last couple of days. But, I make myself eat because I know my body needs it. Uggg.

The worst part of this stuff is it is apparent I'm not myself. Nearly everyone in the office has asked me if I'm okay because I, "just don't seem like my usual peppy self." Most of the time I just smile and say I'm tired. I told a couple that I'm taking a new medication and getting use to it. I just don't feel like talking about it, or really talking in general. That must be the tip off that I'm not myself - I'm actually not talking very much! :)

After work I ran/walked with a co-worker, who is trying to run her first race in October, for about an hour. I decided to do my workout on the treadmill in the clubhouse tonight because I wasn't feeling well and I didn't want to be too far from home if something happened. Today I was scheduled for a 5 mile pace run (2 mile warm up - 10:00 pace, 2 mile race pace or faster - 8:30 pace, 1 mile cool down - 10:00 pace). I kept running off to the side, so I was concentrating more on staying on the damn treadmill than the run itself.

Well, not feeling great so I'm gonna head to bed.

Monday, July 10, 2006

The Wedding Story

Oh the drama...

My family (parents, brother and grandmother) picked me up on Friday morning. Setting up the scene for a long, trying weekend - my grandma, who I love dearly, is in the early-mid stages of alzheimer's. While this could be an entire blog in itself, she has always been spunky, but now she just gets under your skin and is hard on the nerves. It's not really fair, because it isn't her fault but... it's just hard to deal with.

We got up to Traverse early afternoon and decided to walk around the Cherry Festival. It was hot and we had all been stuck in the car for a few hours, so no one was in the best of moods. My grandma didn't want to walk anywhere and every few steps would ask my dad, "how much more do I have to walk? I don't want to walk anymore." There really isn't much to the Cherry Festival, so we weren't there long.

After getting back to our hotel room, we found that my aunt, uncle and four cousins (all boys ages 12-6) had arrived and we went out to dinner together. I don't see them very often, so we had a nice time. Afterwards, the boys went swimming. My brother and I just watched because he was tired and I wanted to go to bed early so I could get up and run. They didn't understand the concept of going to bed early.

At 6 am I got up for my 9 mile run. A trail started nearby the hotel, and it went down to Grand Traverse Bay. Most of the "trail" was the sidewalk through town, but running near the water was so enjoyable. It was so quiet and peaceful. The sun was reflecting off of the water and the boats were a sight to see. My time was a bit fast, and I was pretty sure it wasn't 9 miles like the lady at the hotel desk told me. My mom and I clocked it with the car and it was about 8.5 miles. I was a little upset that I didn't get my full run in, but kept telling myelf to relax. After breakfast I went swimming with the boys. Yeah, I totally made up that 1/2 mile! They kept wanting to race. No big dea,l right? The pool isn't that big. True, but there are FOUR of them and only ONE of me. I was exhausted!!!!!

We did some sightseeing and I was so tired and moody. That stupid medicine! Afterwards, my mom suggested we get sandwiches before the wedding so we weren't starving. I started crying because I didn't want a sandwich! Silly, I know but it really did make me cry.

We went back to the hotel to get ready for the wedding. My grandma didn't want to take a shower, didn't want to get dressed and didn't know why where we were going. My poor mom was trying to be patient, but she was ready for a stiff drink. Plus, we were all pretty pissed at my cousin (the bride) and my aunt (mother of the bride) because grandma wasn't invited to the rehersal dinner and wasn't asked to arrive early for pictures or to see her granddaughter before the ceremony. I know they had a lot to do, and I know having my grandma around is a full time job. But, hello!!!! She is your grandmother.

The outdoor ceremony was beautiful and my cousin looked stunning. Afterwards, my mom was ready to drink so we started in on the merlot. No crazy bouquet stories - it was set up for my cousin's (brother of the bride) girlfriend to catch it. Fine by me. I didn't even go out there. I mean, come on. I know I'm single. Do you need to announce it to a room full of strangers!?! And, if I wanted a guy I didn't know feeling me up, I'd at least want to get a free drink or two out of it! :) I also found out that there is a pool going to see how long the marriage is going to last. I think the high number was 3 1/2 years. They fight a lot, and even started fighting immediately after the ceremony because he thought they were taking too many pictures. Hmmmm.... good luck.

Afterwards, my brother, cousin (Matthew) and his girlfriend(Missy), my cousin's friend (Dan) and my cousin's cousin (chrissy) from the other side of the family all went to the bar. Chrissy was already trashed and we thought the only drama for the night would be her hooking up with Dan. When we got to the bar, Dan opened a tab and said the night was on him. Missy and I were super excited about this. About half way into the first beer, Chrissy got really upset about something and walked out. I thought the little hallway she went down was the bathroom. I lost the draw, so I went after her. Yeah. That little hallways lead to a back door. I went out and Chrissy was NO WHERE to be seen. Finally, Missy and Matthew came out and we went tromping down the sidewalk trying to find our drunk, hysterical friend. We finally found her sitting on a bench outside of McDonald's crying on some stranger's shoulder. After a lot of talking, she calmed down and we started walking her to her hotel, which was just a little bit down the street. Meanwhile, my feet are killing me so I had to take off my heels and was walking down the street barefoot. We got her up to her room (after waking her mother and grandmother) and said goodnight.

Oh, but it doesn't end there. We were down in the lobby when Chrissy's sister's boyfriend came in. His girlfriend (Laura) was passed out in the car and he couldn't get her up. So, Missy and I continued our night of taking care of drunks and went out to the car. We got her up easily (Her boyfriend tried for 45 min. to get her up. We told him girls just have that special touch) and helped her walk to the hotel room. Since we put her sister in one room, we had to put her in their other room. Little did we know they were joining rooms. So, we saw their mom and grandma again. An hour and a half later, we get back to the bar where my brother and Dan had been sitting and drinking the entire time. Last call had already been called, and we were all too tired to drink anyway. Missy and I were so upset that we had an open tab for the night and couldn't even take advantage of it!!

It was a long drive home. We were all tired, ready to not be so "together" and my grandma was in rare form. Again, I love my family but I was SO happy to get home to my nice, quiet apartment!

Thursday, July 06, 2006

Finally! Chinese Laundry Boots = Runners calves

After work I ran to DSW to find some shoes for my cousin's wedding, which is Saturday. (Which I should be packing for right now since I'm leaving tomorrow morning.) Got some really cute heels that look perfect with the dress... that I got yesterday.

Then, in the distance I saw them. Boots! Now, I know it's July and I love sandal season, but boot season is so exciting. I've never been able to get the high boots because, well frankly, designers don't keep runners calf muscles in mind while making them. I know I'm not alone when I say how sad it has always been to try on countless kinds, (even the "stretch" ones) only to find you can only zip them up half way.

Wistfully thinking maybe this year would be different, I sat down and began trying them on. One by one. One "stretch" pair fit, but they weren't that nice looking and were poorly made. Then. I found them. A beautiful pair of black boots that gently zipped over my muscular calves. Triumph!!! So, even though it's July I have some sweet ass boots patiently waiting in my closet until it's time!

Yep, those are running shoes in that picture, too. My morning run sucked. It hurt too much and I only could last for 1/2 mile. Since I was up, I jumped on the bike and got in about 5 1/2 miles. Frustrating? Yes. But, I had to remind myself that I was up and working out twice a day. Last year at this time I could barely walk. Tonight's run was much better - 6 miles at 10:00 pace. I didn't want to push it too much tonight because of this morning. Although it was a bit slower than I would have liked, it felt nice and relaxed. What more can you ask for?

So, heading up north for my cousin's wedding this weekend. Looking forward to some new scenery for my long run. Traverse City is so beautiful so I'm sure it'll be a great run. Not really looking forward to the actual wedding though. I love her because she's my cousin (we were close growing up), but don't really like who she became as an adult. Not too fond of the guy either. My mom and I were planning on just drinking a lot, but I'm on these meds now. When I told her this she said, "Hmmmm. Well maybe you should just skip it on Saturday." Is my mom awesome or what.

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Lots of complaining - read at your own risk

I have only been on this stupid medication for two days now and I HATE it!!!

Dry mouth - Yes, and it's so damn annoying. They suggest sucking on candy or ice chips. Yeah, because that's what I want to do all day. I've also had this bad taste in my mouth all day. Do you know how many times I brushed my teeth today!?!

Upset stomach - I really think being nauseated is one of the worst physical feelings.

Sleepy - Couldn't get up for my morning run today. Not like I was too tired, more like my body felt like dead weight and I'm still not sure how I made it to work.

Fuzzy feeling - It's like I'm on a fucking cloud and can't get back to my body. This was especially not appreciated during my workout with Ricky today.

Headache - Off and on throughout the day.

Nighmares - Well, not really... After watching the news all day yesterday, I had a dream that North Korea missed the U.S. and hit Europe. I woke up not quite sure if N. Korea declared war on Europe or what. Never mind the geographical differences - it's a dream, right? (I'll say it. I am so fucking weird.)

Breast enlargment - No, not yet. But, I'm keeping my fingers crossed on this one!

Moody - nooooo, not at all. I go back and forth between being pissed off and being really sad. It didn't help that I was in a ton of pain today either. I'd get really pissed that it hurt, then really sad because I hate it, then really pissed off that this stupid medicine doesn't work right away, then really sad because I was being so selfish since this is nothing compared to what others go through (I've been thinking a lot about Mrs. B lately...), etc., etc., etc. It's a vicious cycle.

It's a good thing mouse is on vacation, because I'm pretty sure no one wants to be around me. The thing that concerns me is that this is such a SMALL dose and I'm reacting this way already. Hopefully, my body will begin to adjust soon and this will all go away. I don't think I can handle staying on it if I don't. Damn, now I'm getting all sad again. UGGGGHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

Option number two

The appointment went okay. Not really sure what I was hoping to come out of it - besides learning that they had suddenly come up with a magical cure. My next option is medication. I am not thrilled about it, but it's what I have to do. They've found that anti-depressions given in low dosage can help with chronic pain. The idea is for the medication to help calm down my over active nerves. Hopefully once that is established, I'll start physical therapy again. With the nerves calmer, my body may be able to tolerate it better. My body has to adjust to it, so it is given in very, very small dosage at first and then increase it in steps.

Possible side effects range from sleepiness (check), upset stomach (check), irritablity (more than usual?) and even breast enlargement (Sweet! Hopefully I'll be able to check that box!) If my body doesn't take to this, there are two other types that we'll try. They weren't sure how long I'll be on these because it ranges from person to person. They did tell me it is a possibility that it could be indefinitely. I told them that that is not an option. I refuse to be on them for the rest of my life.

After that, I insisted on knowing the full game plan. I told them that I've already been dealing with this for a year, and want to make sure they are on always thinking ahead. They kept talking about this stage and that it was going to take a few months until we know if it's working. I assured them I understood that and didn't mind waiting a few months to see if it was working, but I didn't want to wait until then to decide what to do next in the case it didn't work. Unfortunatley, there aren't many more options after this. Injections possibly, but it's difficult in my case because there isn't one known trigger point. That's mostly done with back pain, hip pain, etc. where they know the pain source. They don't know mine. Surgery is really the only other option, which they really don't want to do and I really don't want to go through. I'm not going to dwell on that now, but not going to ignore that as something that is possibly in my future.

The major down side to taking this medication is I can't drink! I still have three weddings and my girls weekend this summer. Not to mention, plenty of happy hours, football season is around the corner or random wine nights... Ricky was happy about this part of my treatment. He wasn't thrilled that I enjoy my alcohol. Hey, I'm not training for the Olympics here.

Speaking of training...
Yesterday, we did a series of explosion exercises, pyrometrics and 6 200m timed repeats. Not too strenuous, but a good workout. Another trainer, who used to work with Ricky, hung out with us and watched. During the pyrometrics, they were commenting on my muscular legs. I believe the quote was, "yeah, she's got some thighs." I chose to take that as a compliment and immediately thought of the Nike ad on my fridge that starts out, "I have thunder thighs and that is a compliment because they are strong"

Today I did 3 miles in the morning in the sweltering sun. I was planning on doing the Tortise and Hare 5k in Ann Arbor, but the medication knocked me out and I didn't hear my alarm. In fact, I slept through it for several hours. Tonight I had a great repeat workout, which I was actually dreading, but it ended up not being bad.

2 mile warm up
6 x 800m (9:00 pace) - 200m walk between
1 mile cool down

Anyway, I've been babbling long enough. Gotta get to bed since the morning workout is going to get here pretty early.

Monday, July 03, 2006

Dreading this afternoon

The office is closed today, so I enjoyed sleeping in a little and having a leisurely breakfast while watching the Today show (Nick Lachey was the summer concert today...).

I started watching the Tour but needed to go for my morning run. I decided to trade in fresh air for a TV, so I (gasp!) walked over to the clubhouse to run on the treadmill and continue to watch the Tour. I'm usually lazy and drive the little bit over to the clubhouse, so I was already ahead.

Ran my morning 3 miles (10:00 pace) and really wanted to do arms. I kept going back and forth, since I have my workout with Ricky tonight. He's always telling me not to worry about time or my workout, just go with what my body is telling me. Well, my body was telling me it wanted to lift weights so I did some light bi's and tri's.

Got back and jumped in the shower to prepare for my doctor's appointment. In other words, do a very complete job of shaving. It's kinda like getting ready for a big date. (Sigh!) No date, just a few more doctors poking, prodding and saying, "... so, we're going to have to do an exam today," as they pull out the good 'ol stirrups.

The purpose of today's appointment is to evaluate my physical therapy and decide next steps. I'd say it's a bust since she dumped me a month or two ago. Hopefully they will have some more options for me to try. I'm tired of fucking around and want to be agressive with my treatment (short of surgery though). That said, I'm going to walk in the door optimistic, yet realistic. I'm going to be confident in my doctor's, yet be confident in myself to take charge of my own medical health. Keep your finger's crossed!

Sunday, July 02, 2006

The Tour and Prada

Over the last few years, I've become fascinated with the the Tour de France. Admittedly, it was due to the Lance Armstrong reign... like much of the world. Yesterday's prologue was SO exciting! I'll be cheering on George Hincapie this year. After years of working with his team to help bring Armstrong to a victory, he's earned the chance to now be the one taking the lead. After today's yellow jersey win, I'm excited to follow him through the tour.

The doping scandal saddens me. As the commentators discussed yesterday, my initial thought was, "every rider must have woken up that morning thinking, 'hmmm, I actually have shot at this this year.'" We often hear about doping with the mainstream sports, and brush it aside with a scoff. Those multi-million dollar athletes caught cheating... and no one blinks twice. I tend to be of the mindset that cycling is one of those sports that is pure. Training hard, refined talent and pure athleticism. I hope those athletes are being wrongly accussed and it will come out that they are talented athletes who work hard for their accomplishments.

Now, to my own training. Ran 10 miles yesterday and it was okay. My last three miles were a bit painful, but I still came in with a pace of under 10:00. I started with a stabbing pain on my right, which I woke up with. Towards the middle of the run, I started getting that prickling feelin in the center. It then progressed to a stabbing pain on my left, which stayed with me the rest of the day. Throughout the run, I kept reminding myself that it is still early in my training and I have time to continue getting stronger and continue lowering my time. Not sure if I was trying to remind myself, or convince myself.

I took a quick shower when I got home and decided to take my nap out by the pool. A friend came over to join me and later we had a great dinner at The Melting Pot. I LOVE fondue and this was really good. A little expensive - it cost more than what I spend in a week on groceries - but really good. We were thinking about a night out, but were really tired. We ended up going to see A Devil Wears Prada (LOVED THE CLOTHES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) and a quick beer at BW3. We felt a little lame heading to the movies in jeans and t-shirts, while a bunch of barely 21-year-olds wearing little to no clothing lined up at a dance club. :)