Sunday, July 23, 2006

Running Is Stupid!

Yesterday was an interesting day. I got up a bit later than I planned, but it was the perfect morning for a run. At 8am it was 62* and a little overcast - perfect. I was looking forward to my 13-miler. Since I bumped up my dosage, I have to take one pill in the morning and one pill before I went to bed. Before my run, I was trying to figure out if I should take it before or after running. Since I had a lunch date with the boy that afternoon :) I decided it would be better to not show him that I was a crazy girl with a drug dependancy problem right off the bat.

A little bit into my run, I started to feel disoriented, which isn't the greatest while on a run. I was only a few miles in, but I had decided that running was stupid and I wasn't finishing this run. Over and over in my head I was thinking, "this is stupid. Why am I doing this to myself?" Shortly after this, I realized I had to at least get back to my car and it would be faster to run instead of walk back. As I was going back to my car, again the crazy voice in my head started saying, "this is stupid. I'm not running over again. I'm finished. Running is stupid." By the time I got back to the beginning of the path, I started thinking that all the people that hold me accountable for running, were going to ask how my weekend run went. I couldn't bring myself to say, "well, running is stupid and I quit." Then, I started thinking that if I decided later that I really did want to continue training for Detroit, if I quit now I would have missed a long run and that's never good. Ugggg.... after years of playing sports, that stupid mantra of never quitting has become engrained into my head.

Here are my "stupid" splits. Not the best, but hey, I finished.
Mile 1 - 10:14
Mile 2 - 9:56
Mile 3 - 10:39
Mile 4 - 10:30
Mile 5 - 10:32
Mile 6 - 10:02
Mile 7 - 10:15
Mile 8 - 10:04
Mile 9-12 39:49
Mile 13 - 9:57

So, that's my psycho side... but the afternoon did get better.

JP picked me up and we had a nice lunch. Afterwards, we went to Lucky's which is a bar and more upscale arcade for adults. (I had challenged him to an air hockey match last weekend.) We had a lot of fun playing air hocky, skee-ball and racing games. And, it was the first time I had really laughed in a long time. He's going to teach me how to salsa dance, so it seems like there is going to be a second date in my future.

Later that night, I was looking forward to going out with mouse and some of her friends for a crazy night of fun. We ordered pizza and, of course, had a beer with dinner. That ended up not being a good idea. While I was about to get ready, the room suddenly started to spin and I felt like the floor was going to give out underneath me. Thinking it would soon go away, I laid down on my floor and promptly feel asleep. Mouse came in to see what the hell I was doing and I told her I didn't think I was going to make it out with them. Yeah, alcohol and this new medicine just doesn't go very well together. So, I missed out on a night of fun. And yes, I am planning on calling my doctor tomorrow morning. (It does this to me even when alcohol isn't involved.) Seriously, this whole medicine thing is really interferring with my social life! :)

Today, so far, has been a day of doing nothing. Slept in, went out for breakfast/lunch and laid out by the pool. Perfect end to a good (for the most part) weekend.


Unknown said...

I am so glad that you pushed yourself to finish your long run. You REALLY need to talk to the doctor about your meds. These side effects that you describe do NOT sound anywhere from being normal.

Your date with JP sounds very nice. Crossing my fingers for you and the 2nd date. Sounds like a nice guy.

Radioactive Tori said...

Sounds like a great weekend! Sorry your run was not so great, but I'm glad you finished it. I know what you mean about the whole "never quitting" thing. Sometimes it sucks, but other tiems it is a nice motivator.

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